For both Denise and me, these past few weeks have been both a challenge and a blessing. Tonight Denise is in Florence, Alabama caring for her father who had a stroke and today moved from the hospital to rehab. We received the news on Wednesday and she spent Thursday driving from Minnesota to Alabama. Yesterday and today I walked with Dad as he navigated rehab and life at Good Samaritan in Albert Lea, Minnesota. Spending my days in Albert Lea (just as Denise had been doing from the last week of July until this week) has been an opportunity to both walk with Dad and get to know a phenomenal care staff who is working with Dad. I can hear my former Command Chaplain Boss at AF Special Operations Command chuckling that his former Deputy who was an Austin High School Packer was spending so much time in his old stomping grounds… He was an Albert Lea Tiger and they were conference rivals of ours in High School (and still are today). I can’t believe I hired a Packer to be my Deputy was what he said!
Anyway, it has been a time of introspection for me. It has also been a time of fun as HRH Queen Pixie (pictured below) made her presence known at Good Sam’s.
Today was a day for musical reflection as well. It wasn’t a time for introspective music though. I was taking a trip down memory lane with a band that had a significant impact on me in High School and College, Styx. Denise and I got to see them perform in Orange Beach, Alabama during a two week (including two Sundays) break that Presbyterian Community Church in the Rockies in Estes Park, Colorado gave to us following the journey through the Shadows with both of our Moms (Nov 2017 and Mar 2018). The concert had been rained out the night before we arrived and were were able to snag tickets for seats six rows from the front for the re-scheduled concert. Here’s a bit of trivia… Tommy Shaw, the lead guitarist, grew up in Orange Beach, Alabama and was thrilled with the crowd that came back the day after a rain cancellation to enjoy the show.
Well, today as I listened to their music on my drive back to Austin from Albert Lea a song from their recently released album (in my pre-digital brain they are still albums or cassette tapes!) “Crash of the Crowns.” The song is “Hold Back the Darkness.” It pretty much encapsulated the events and feelings of the COVID reality which began in March, 2020 and continues today with new variants. Between the difficulties of change for our Dads and all of the traveling we have been doing, it has been a challenge. So as I was driving, the song touched me as it invited me to reflect on the valleys of the shadows I have encountered throughout my years of ministry and the journey through the valley of the shadows that Denise and I have walked through together with so many parishioners and with our Moms and now, in a different way, our Dads.
These are the closing lines of the song —
And I feel no pain
Nothing can touch me, and I’m gonna win
And I’m not holding back, not reining it in
You hold back the darkness, and we’ll all see the sun rise again. (Crash of Crowns, 2021)
As we walk together through this landscape of fear, hatred, division, and war dear reader; I am reminded that we will indeed see the sun rise again despite the current darkness. These words of Thomas Merton also invite us to walk through the darkness with hope, not hopelessness, as we are led to the dawn of the new day of hope.
And it is in this darkness, when there is nothing left in us that can please or comfort our own minds, when we seem to be useless and worthy of all contempt, when we seem to have failed, when we seem to be destroyed and devoured, it is then that the deep and secret selfishness that is too close to us for us to identify is stripped away from our souls. It is in this darkness that we find liberty. It is in this abandonment that we are made strong. This is the night which empties us and makes us pure. (New Seeds of Contemplation)
This is my hope and my prayer as we walk together through these difficult times, dear reader. May we sense and be supported by the presence of the Spirit as She holds back the darkness and invites us into the sunrise of a new and glorious day!
“But only art and music have the power to bring peace.”—Yoko Ono
We have had a whirlwind these past three, going on four weeks. Dad ended up in the hospital and is now in rehab. We drove up the last Monday in July and helped him go from the hospital to rehab therapy. He is making progress but it is slow going. I went back to Georgia for ten days and Denise stayed behind to encourage Dad and be an Advocate for him.
You know you have been visiting a care center for a while when all of the staff know you (Denise) by name and she knows staff and residents by name and helps out in the chapel, the dining room, and elsewhere in the facility! Of course anyone who knows my beloved wouldn’t be the least bit surprised 😉
Yesterday Denise received a call that her Dad had to be hospitalized. She drove down today to be with him and help him. She will return to Minnesota next week as we prepare to transition Dad from rehab back to The Cedars where he has lived for the past four years. As we had dinner at our favorite restaurant (The Old Mill) in Austin for my birthday we had some laughs along with some reflective moments. Enjoying the dinner and wine (thanks to our good friends Mark & Cathy who made sure we had a nice bottle of wine for the celebratory dinner) we also had fun talking with and getting to know the staff. Hmmmm, Denise talking with and getting to know strangers who are now friends… is there a pattern here? 😉
As Denise drove to Alabama and I spent the day with Dad, I thought about how quickly life can change. I also thought about how we literally don’t know what may happen from day to day. The psalmist reminds us that This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it. (Psalm 118:24)
Life is a journey with all sorts of twists and turns in it. While we may not know what is going to happen next, I find comfort in God’s promise and presence in the midst of the unknown. Thomas Merton’s Prayer of Abandonment and Trust speaks to my heart, especially during these challenging times.
My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think that I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road though I may know nothing about it. Therefore will I trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone. — Thomas Merton (Thoughts in Solitude)
I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone… what a beautiful reminder as we walk this path together. We are thankful for family and friends who are walking with us and for our Carrollton Presbyterian Church family who continue to support us and pray with us. Yes, God will never leave us to face our perils alone.
“It’s not about standing still and becoming safe. If anybody wants to keep creating they have to be about change.”—Miles Davis
“People across the nation and all over the world are taking actions to build a community in which the values of justice, cooperation, and respect for this fragile world are upheld. Almost none of these are actions we will ever hear about.”—Voices for Creative Nonviolence
Verse of the day
And I am extremely angry with the nations that are at ease; for while I was only a little angry, they made the disaster worse.
– Zechariah 1:15
Voice of the day
The top 10 percent of us, those who make more than $38,000 a year, are responsible for more than half the world’s carbon emissions.
– Bill McKibben
Prayer of the day
We have wounded your love.
O God, heal us.
We stumble in the darkness.
Light of the world transfigure us.
We forget that we are your home.
Spirit of God, dwell in us.
– A New Zealand Prayer Book
The sun has set and the Vesper Lights flicker and glow
It has been a long day, Lord
It has also been a good day
A day for worship and reflection
A day for fellowship and a day to prepare for travel
As Pixie and I head to bed
Our hearts are set on Tuesday evening
An evening when we reunite with my beloved
May our sleep this night be refreshing
May our journey be safe
Now as my eyelids grow heavy
I lift this humble prayer to you
Dona Nobis Pacem
Grant Us Peace
A wee prayer from the heart of your Padre…
“Constructive ideas (not wars) mark the forward progress of mankind. Art can change the world. Art is a communication that is more powerful and more real to any human being than any gun or war. It changes people’s opinions, style, ideas, and even sometimes people’s way of living. We should concentrate on art and peace, not hate and war. The day we can truly trust each other, there will be peace on Earth.”—Anonymous
A beautiful quintet of Sonnets from Malcolm Guite!
On August 15th many churches across the world, Catholic, Orthodox and Anglican, keep a feast for the Blessed Virgin Mary, fulfilling the scripture …
A Quintet of Sonnets for Mary
In the opening verses of 1 Kings:3-14 we read about the lavish offering which Solomon offered in the temple once his reign was firmly established. Now Solomon was anything but perfect, just like his father David before him. The first strike we see is when Solomon, who loved the Lord and followed his statues sacrificed and offered incense at the high places. Offerings and sacrifices in Israel were to be offered at the Temple in Jerusalem. The high places were where others worshipped, and people were led away from God to worship idols and local gods.
While we could focus on Solomon’s failings, I want to focus on something that he did which pleased God. Even though he was worshipping in the wrong place, God still came to him in a dream. The Lord asked Solomon, Ask what I should give you. Solomon had given a lavish offering to God and now God asked what Solomon wanted in return.
Have you ever thought about what you would do if you came into a large sum of money? In the movie, “It Could Happen to You” a cop asked the waitress at the diner he had been going to for years to help him pick the numbers for his weekly lottery ticket. In the movie when the cop hears that his lottery ticked was the big winner, his wife was thrilled. That was short-lived when the cop said that he was going to share half of the winnings with the waitress who helped him pick the winning numbers. The cop had a choice in the matter, and I would say that he chose wisely and generously. He thought of others before himself.
Solomon himself had a choice to make. Even though he had the United Kingdom of Israel and Judah which his father had reigned over he could have asked for more. He could have asked for more wealth, more territory, or many other things. Instead, Solomon asked for something to help him be a better ruler. Give your servant therefore an understanding mind to govern your people, able to discern between good and evil; for who can govern this your great people? (1 Kings 3:9)
God’s response showed God’s pleasure with Solomon’s act of selflessness as he began his rule. Because you have asked this and have not asked for yourself long life or riches, or for the life of your enemies, but have asked for yourself understanding to discern what is right, I now do according to your word. Indeed, I give you a wise and discerning mind; no one like you has been before you and no one like you shall arise after you. (3:11-12)
While we may not be Kings like Solomon, we do have a choice when it comes to asking God for things. I know that I have been guilty of asking for selfish desires without thinking of others. Despite my selfishness, the love of God is never withdrawn from me, and it can be the same for you. May we ask for discerning and understanding minds and hearts as we seek to serve the Lord. Can you imagine what might happen if local community, state, national, and international leaders dropped their often greedy and self-serving ways and decided to govern with wisdom on behalf of all the people?
In Psalm 34:9-14 we can explore how this passage ties into such wisdom. In that Psalm, the psalmist invites the people to “fear” the Lord in order to have “no want.” Come, O children, listen to me; I will teach you the fear of the Lord. (34:11)The next two verses are where I see the connection between the two readings. Which of you desires life, and covets many days to enjoy good? Keep your tongue from evil, and your lips from speaking deceit. (34:12-13)
Just what is this “fear” that the psalmist is talking about? Too often we think of this fear as being afraid of God. In the context of the Hebrew language, fear means “to honor or reverence” God. Just as Solomon chose gifts that would honor God and help him to be a more compassionate and just ruler, the psalmist invites us to make choices that honor God. Instead of telling us to be terrified of God, the psalmist invites the reader to honor and revere God through our words and our actions. How does one do that? The psalmist offers these closing words in verse 14 — Depart from evil, and do good; seek peace, and pursue it. This is the way of wisdom. This is the way of compassion. This is the way of justice. This is the way of peace. In the words of Thomas Merton from his book, The Nonviolent Alternative (p. 35), Peace demands the most heroic labor and the most difficult sacrifice. It demands greater heroism than war. It demands greater fidelity to the truth and a much more perfect purity of conscience.
As we seek wisdom and peace for our neighbors and strangers, we will be seeking them for ourselves as well. Merton reminds me of the challenges that I have had as I contemplate where I have been as an Air Force Chaplain and where God seems to be leading me as a “Peacemaker.” Will you join with me in this journey, dear reader?
